Friday, August 3, 2012

The Holistic Challenge

“He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion.”

~ Unknown

This is my beloved little buddy Mack. When he was still a puppy, I recognised that he was a very old soul. He is an earth angel, and so very special. He's been my constant companion for the past thirteen years. And I love him with all my heart. We've been through a lot together - it's been a sometimes bumpy and difficult ride over the years. And he's had many health issues - including long term liver problems.

When Mack and his beautiful little sister Mitzy were five, they were both diagnosed with the same liver problems. At that time I was naively entrusting their care to entirely the wrong people, which ultimately lead to us losing Mitz, and me turning my back on conventional treatments and instead seeking out a far more holistic approach to their health care. When the so-called 'experts' threw their hands in the air and told me that there was nothing more they could do for either of them, I simply chose not to listen. Sadly, it was too late for Mitz, but fastforward a little over eight years, and Mack has thrived on holistic therapies. He's become quite the 'new age' dog, having experienced all manor of holistic modalities and remedies during that time - animal communications, massage, reiki, CST, bowen therapy, acupuncture, homeopathy, herbal remedies, chiropractic, natural diet. Animals very often love and respond incredibly well to such treatments. I would very strongly recommend anyone consider a more holistic and natural approach to the care of their animal companions.

But some months ago, something changed. Mack's health began to take a downward turn and initially I thought it was a severe allergic reaction to flea bites - his skin flared up very badly and he began to lose weight. And the weight continued to fall away from him. Then on the 4th of May we had a blood test done, and it was not at all what I wanted to hear. The results were devastating - his liver enzyme readings were off the scale - literally. We have since discovered that a blockage of an unknown nature has developed in his gall bladder/bowel area, he's been losing protein through his kidneys - which accounts for the dramatic weight loss. To complicate things further, there are other health issues as well. He's been an extremely unwell little boy, and it's breaking my heart. In the last three months, Mack has taken me on by far the most challenging, emotionally difficult, and yet spiritually enlightening journey we have ever been on together.

The turning point came at a particular time in my life when a number of less than positive elements converged, and I allowed myself to fall into a very negative headspace - which never ought to have happened. I should have known better. Mack is an extremely sensitive soul, and he has always readily picked up on my state of being. I knew that. I was going through emotional upheaval and I just wasn't paying the attention to him that I should have been, which I deeply regret now. Precious and painful lessons have been learned.

We are truly blessed to have such a wonderful, open-minded, and brilliant vet as Avinder. He isn't your every day kind of vet - he's a very special soul. I have so much respect for him and his work. He has many times succeeded where conventional vets fail. We have spoken at length about many cases he has had significant success with (using mainly homeopathics) - animal companions that have been given up for dead by conventional vets who get to the end of their text books, and then have no clue. Avinder and I are very much on the same page with regards to the spiritual aspects of animal healing. And he's probably the only vet I could ever openly talk to about my channeling, and the messages and the guidance that I have been receiving from Spirit with regards to this situation.

"...all healing is from the Divine within, and not from medications. Medications only attune or accord a body for the proper reactions from the elemental forces of divinity within each corpuscle, each cell, each muscle, each activity of every atom of the body itself."

~ from Edgar Cayce reading 1173-6

The months, weeks and days since the 4th of May have been filled with frustration, despair, tears, hope, epiphanies and profound personal spiritual insights, understanding, and intense spiritual growth on a scale I haven't experienced before. I feel as though I've been intentionally pushed way beyond my comfort zone, in a direction I hadn't anticipated going. And that's certainly been the very clear message that I've been getting from Spirit. I've found myself delving into things that I haven't paid any heed to for years - things that I began to explore when I first started down the spiritual pathway back in the mid-1990s.

I've had some really amazing experiences with healing in the past - of all the wonderful things that have ever happened, even now, this would have to be one of the most special. I met someone in 1996 who told me that she was a medium and could speak with Spirits - not something I'd given any thought to up until then. But I found Bec to be completely down-to-earth, funny and entirely credible. I found myself easily believing her. Our paths were meant to cross. We became friends. She got me curious. I began exploring for myself, all things psychic and metaphysical. Then in June of 1997, I had an extraordinary crossing of paths with an amazing Thai national by the name of Jit - she was undertaking studies at La Trobe University, where my cousin was studying at the time. She was a director of a deaf school in Thailand, and did at some point, spend a brief period of time with Mother Theresa, as I recall. She told me things I struggled to understand. Taught me meditation - and to pray for loved ones beforehand. This was when I first began to experience the visions. And began to discover that, amazingly, you actually could focus your attention on someone and have a healing effect on them. I didn't understand it. I just knew something was happening. It felt like the most natural thing in the world to be doing. And that was where it all began.

"Once you are ready to truly devote your days and times to what your Soul came here to do, you will find your life unimaginably enriched."

~ Neale Donald Walsch

Lately, I've found myself delving deeply into that aspect of my life once again - the holistic, the spiritual, the metaphysical. It is as though I simply wasn't given a choice - there have been times in the past few months where I've almost felt as though I've had a hand on my back, pushing me in this direction. I've had to draw on all of my own inner strength, the sometimes incredible personal experiences that I've had, all that I have learned, and the knowledge that I have acquired over the years. And I've found myself unexpectedly being guided back towards the wisdom and teachings of certain people that have come into my life in one way or another in the past. People that I respect immensely. People like Penelope Smith, and the extraordinarly gifted Betty Shine. Betty transitioned in March 2002, but left an amazing legacy behind. Her stunning healing, psychic and mediumship gifts and abilities would have challenged the most hardened and closed-minded of skeptics. She was simply remarkable, and I would give anything to have her abilities. I lent my books to someone many years ago and they lost one of them ('Mind Waves'). It's long since out of print, but I now have a new (secondhand) copy on its way from the UK.

“There is a power inside every human against which no earthly force is of the slightest consequence.”

~Neville Lancelot Goddard (1905-1972)

Penelope Smith is a wonderful Animal Communications Specialist, who has a beautiful series of tapes/cds and books available for anyone who wants to explore this area more. I bought these tapes about eight years ago, and can highly recommend them. Whether we are aware of it or not, our animal companions take on our issues, and reflect our own states of being back to us. If we are wise and open, we will recognise this. Significant spiritual understanding can be gained from paying more attention to the animals in your life. These tapes will give you a far greater insight and understanding of your animal friends. It will enrich your relationship with them and reward you in ways you might not expect. Our animal companions can be our greatest guides and teachers.

I did a couple of beginners tarot courses about five years ago. For some reason, I finished the courses, packed the cards away, and haven't looked at them since. Until one night back in June, I suddenly found myself sitting unexpectedly on my bed, doing a reading for myself. I had to rely heavily on my course notes, I'd forgotten most of what I'd learned - but it's was enough. I got the message. Loud and clear. The tarot can be very confronting and revealing - it holds nothing back.

My beautiful Mack has been forcing me to pay far closer attention to every aspect of my life than I ever have before. It's been an incredibly intense few months. I'm looking at the vision boards I created in March in a whole new light now - and seeing the 'big picture' with a deeper level of clarity, understanding and finally, acceptance. I'm acutely and painfully aware of how deeply Mack's health issues and my own fears, self doubts and stubborn, pigheaded refusal to listen to what the Universe has been trying for so long to tell me, are entwined. All of the things I have been ignoring or avoiding for the longest of times are now suddenly very much right there in front of me. There's simply nowhere to hide any more. And maybe, just maybe, the one thing above all else that Spirit has been trying (unsuccessfully) to tell me over the years, might - just might - bear more truth than I'd up until now believed. No matter how far-fetched, how ridiculous, how utterly fanciful, no matter how totally and completely unbelievable it seems. I'm looking back - at everything that has happened over the years. I couldn't possibly have imagined it all, surely? And now for the first time, I'm beginning to seriously wonder.

"Everything is falling together perfectly, even though it looks as if some things are falling apart. Trust in the process you are now experiencing. Life is on your side. It is showing that to you now, though you may not be able to see it clearly at this time."

~ Neale Donald Walsch

I've taken some time away from work to spend with Mack. A couple of weeks. There are still a few more days before I need to go back. I'm giving him everything I have to give. I've learned some very hard lessons through this journey with him. Lessons I should never have needed to learn. He really is an earth angel, and so very, very special.

I sat and watched Louise Hay's 'You Can Heal Your Life: the Movie' twice the other day. I am completely in awe of the work of Jerry & Esther (Abraham) Hicks, and that of Gregg Braden. I've been learning a lot from these extraordinary people. And I've been amazed at how Doreen Virtue's weekly angel card readings have been so closely reflecting the course my own life has been taking over these past months. I've gone back and listened to every reading since 4 June several times. Each time I've listened, they've taken on deeper levels of significance.

There have been many synchronistic moments over the past three months that have been impossible to ignore. Signs. Dates. Numbers. 44 is a number that keeps coming up again and again, in very significant ways.

A couple of mornings after I started my leave two weeks ago, I awoke from a dream. As I woke up the dream faded immediately, but one word remained - 'Juno'. I had no idea what it meant, but had a sense that it was significant. Then on that Friday evening, as I sat with Mack in the waiting room of our vet clinic, a woman walked in with a bunch of flowers in her hand. She went to the reception to pay her bill. Then she walked over to me and asked if I was ok. I burst into tears. When the consult was finished and I walked to the counter to pay, I discovered that she had left the flowers for me - white lilies. It was such a beautiful gesture from a complete stranger. It really touched me. I took some photographs of the flowers, and my previous post is a thanks for such kindness.

Three nights later, I found myself looking up the symbolic meaning of white lilies. And came across this:

"LILY, WHITE: Purity, modesty, virginity, majesty, it's heavenly to be with you. The white lily is linked to Juno, the queen of the gods in Roman mythology, by the story that while nursing her son Hercules, some excess milk fell from the sky creating the group of stars we call the Milky Way, and lilies were created from what milk fell to the earth. The Easter lily is also known as the symbol of the Virgin Mary."

The very day after I was handed those lilies, my sister and her husband boarded a flight to Rome, where they were to begin a three month touring holiday of Europe.

My heart is breaking just that little bit more every day. To date, nothing we have tried has been working. He just isn't responding. I keep wondering if there is something I'm missing, something more or else I ought to be doing. I've had to dig deeper inside myself than I ever have before. It's been tough. I've been channeling, but I've learned the hard way, that when you are so personally involved in a situation, it is extremely difficult to separate yourself enough to get clear messages. You have to remain absolutely detached. I found that out in the months before my brother Mark passed away. But I have been getting very consistent messages. And signs. Some very definite signs. The message has been very clear -'don't give up'. And nor shall I. I am so, so incredibly grateful for all of the support and guidance I have received from Spirit, and for the fact that I can even channel in the first place. It has been an extraordinary experience.

"The success sometimes may come immediately, but we must be ready to wait patiently even for what may look like an infinite length of time. The student who sets out with such a spirit of perseverance will surely find success and realization at last."

~ Swami Vivekananda

I've been calling on every guide and every ounce of Heavenly help I possibly can. I've been drawing on all of my own personal experiences with the metaphysical. I know what is possible. Absolutely nothing is impossible. We are far more than we believe ourselves to be. I keep being told that I'm being asked to trust. It's not easy. But I keep thinking back up over all the times I have received overwhelming validation of channeled information. All the times I have actually argued with Spirit over something (yes, I can be very pigheaded). And all the times I have had to turn around and say, 'ok, I was wrong, you were right - again'. I have to trust in that.

We are never as alone as we think we are. And nothing is ever as it seems. For everything a reason.

Love & light

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